Such is the power of Love. Love does not lay only in romance. When one can completely trust someone, it is love. When two people support each other through tough times, they love each other. When two people completely in acceptance of each other. Even while they differ in opinion in some cases, love is still experienced.
Such was the story of Kerry!
In love with a guy for eight years… but without any commitment from Kabir to marry her. As years passed, she hoped that one day her love will make him commit to her for life. She faced not only mental and emotional abuse, but even physical at times. Yet, for some reason or the other, even if the two would not talk for months together, the attraction between the two grew stronger. She was 29 by then when she had to take the final call.
She could no longer wait for Kabir and got engaged to another, though unwillingly. She had a strong fear that if it is not him, then there can be nobody she can be happy with. Her fear of existence without him became gruesome, yet something in her insisted and paved a path for her to move away from him. She kept waiting for him till a few days were left when Kabir asked her to cancel everything and marry him. Overwhelmed by circumstances and situation this would put her parents, she could not gather courage and more so trust in him that Kabir would stand by his promise.
11th April 2014, she got married. She kept on looking at the gate till the last ceremony was over, but he did not return. Within a few days, she realized that this is not what she can sustain for the rest of her life. She had no connect with her husband whatsoever. She felt like an alien in that house and her world started to cripple.
On 30th May 2014, she left the house and came back to her maternal l home. Not convinced with her decision, everyone ridiculed her. She called him up, and Kabir was no different. His attitude changed, and so did everything. She felt unwanted, outcasted and alone in the world of six billion people. During all this upheaval, they continued to remain connected as both drew a great strength when the other was around.
In January 2016, she was officially divorced. She told Kabir that life has given them another chance, but he denied. February 2016, he got married to another woman, unwillingly. A day before the wedding, she texted him, Come Back Home and received a response I am already gone Kerry. It was the end of the world for her. She felt that her purpose of existence is over… and that she failed.
Crying throughout the night as her love completed the last ritual of his marriage, she somehow managed to gather strength during her daily meditation and set him free. She asked for forgiveness and released him from all the bonds. She prayed to be able to forgive him sent the message to the Universe, If I can wait for Kabir for eight years, I can also wait for him for eight lifetimes, coz I know he has to come home some day!. A strange voice that appeared to be her own and yet was different in intensity, filled with gratitude and said to her, You both are one and inseparable. There is no separation that happened today, there was never a separation that ever existed.
There is never a separation between the Creator and the Created, there is never a separation between you and your reflection, for all you see around you is nothing but you! She opened her eyes…filled in tears filled with unconditional love for herself, for Kabir, and the situation that existed. Suddenly she realized there was no blame, no shame, no guilt and definite no resentment.
She peacefully stood up, walked to her bed, and slept for the night. Kerry in her words, I never felt so serene ever. It was as if everything in me shifted. Each passing day, she prayed for his happiness and that he has the most fulfilling relationship ever. She realized that she had an existence without him and that she must move on. Such is the power of surrender!
The history repeated. Things between her ex and his wife shaped up exactly as she faced in her marriage. While he was going through his proceedings, he realized how much Kerry meant to her. In his mind, he was gearing up to face the blunt of marring Kerry against the wish of his parents. Inter caste marriages remain a taboo in our modern Indian society. But even before he could speak up, his father asked if Kerry was still not married and that if the two would want to tie the knot.
Unconditional Love is our being, it is all that is. It is all that was and will remain. The emotion we identify as love is only a means for us to recognize our existence. Each emotion of ours is our chosen experience. Our soul knows exactly what it needs to learn and manifests life changing experiences to grow and evolve through them. Never fear the journey that the Soul chooses for it is much beyond our mental conception to understand. Fear it not, for fear leads to resistance and our experiences become difficult as the tests become tougher.
Fear cannot harm us. Once we are aware of the Fear and how fear helps us to transcend, it brings forth the growth that we have chosen to witness through it. Fear prevails in all our experiences. Once we find the ability to replace fear with acceptance, we start to dilute the intensity of resistance of the consequences of our experiences that we fear the most. If we continue to give thrust to our fear, we only thicken the dark wall of fear around us. What we resist, persist!
Fear loads us with deeper fear and bring to us only what we fear the most. The Law of Attraction works for what the innate core of us asks for. If we fear something, it will bring forth all such circumstances through which we experience the same fear.
One will keep attracting similar mates or partners from whom we wish to run away from. But once we imbibe the fear as a part of our shadow self, it no longer can haunt us. It simply loses its power in front of love for Self. When we take charge to love ourselves and look no further to see approval from others to be worthy of love, love is mirrored in every relationship we come across. Unconditional love has the highest frequency and can transform any emotion, even fear!
Kerry’s unconditional love for self and the detachment from the consequences of moving away from Kabir transformed her life – she miraculously started her metamorphosis. She started to build up her self-image from scratch after her divorce. Kabir too transformed the life’s most challenging situation being his true authentic self, shedding off layers and layers of parental and societal conditioning of what is right and what ought to be done.
Today, the two are engaged and are eagerly waiting for the wedding bells to ring.
It is time to accept what you fear it is your fear that will lead you to liberation from what you fear the most.
Such was a story one of my student.
The solution is in the cause itself Heal Thyself, Heal Your Life!